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The "Butterfly's Whisper" Blog

Welcome to my blog. I hope by sharing my own misophonia experiences, others who are frustrated with misophonia sensitivities will discover that they're not alone. I also hope that people who may not have misophonia will gain some insight about what it's like to have this condition.

Please feel free to post any comments or use the "Contact Us" page if you have any questions/comments you don't want to post online.

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A (not so) jolly Xmas...

12/27/2014

4 Comments

 
It's very strange being in the middle of the desert for the holiday season. Not saying that the location is a bad thing, I actually think it's beautiful out here, just very strange that the leaves only started to change colors at the beginning of December and even now, it resembles more of an autumn day to me than winter. It's actually quite refreshing after two years of temperatures in the -20's (yes, Fahrenheit) and lower.

But being out in Vegas is not the reason why my Xmas was not so jolly. (I still love it out here.) No, the reason why is that I've been having issues with my downstairs neighbors cranking up the bass on their Bose system and slamming doors out of passive aggressiveness for months now. As bad as it has been, Thursday was the ABSOLUTE WORST. From 10 a.m. onward, the Bose system was so loud, I could actually FEEL it - even while taking a break lying on my new foam mattress in the back room of the apartment. It felt like I had a vibrating bed (which I do, but the massage feature was off).

Normally, I'd leave my apartment to escape from the noise but I was determined to use that day to get my place in shape for visitors. For seven hours, I unpacked boxes and hung pictures - sometimes even cranking up my music to try to camouflage their noise. (I like loud music too - when I can hear the music and not just the thumping of the bass line. I just normally listen to it in the privacy of my car or while wearing earbuds at work.) After the seven hours, I was developing such a migraine that I decided to take a break and pick up some Chinese food for dinner. (What's a Jewish girl to do on Xmas - especially after being deprived of it for two years because ALL the restaurants in the Midwest where I lived were closed for Xmas?)

It was actually nice to give my head - and body - a break to unwind but what happened when I got back was too bizarre for words. I was barely in the apartment for 5 minutes unpacking the Chinese food when my doorbell rang. It was my downstairs neighbor yelling at me and threatening, "If you call the police on me again...) I didn't have a clue what the hell he was talking about. I was gone for over an hour and despite being really pissed off that he was blasting his music all day, I wasn't going to complain about it on Xmas. I'm not a Scrooge! Now, if he had continued blasting his Bose beyond midnight, then I wouldn't consider it Xmas anymore and I would've complained, but the noise was gone when I got back from my drive.

No, I hadn't called the police on him... His music was so loud during the day, it wouldn't have surprised me if one of the other neighbors called in a complaint. Seeing how he was brazen enough to come up to my apartment and threaten me though... That action made me call the police. Four officers came and after speaking with me about what happened, they went down to him and told him to leave me alone.

What's even more bizarre is that he told the officers that the reason why they play their music so loud is because they have a baby with a congenital heart defect and (supposedly) the loud music is supposed to help the baby. Okay, I'm not a doctor but that sounds completely ridiculous to me. How is LOUD music beneficial to a baby with a weak heart?!?!? They also have two other girls (I can only guess who are 5 and 7 years old) in their apartment. How the heck is playing music so loud for so long (and for so late) good for any of the children?

I can only hope that karma will eventually bite them hard  in the @$$ one day!  ;-)
4 Comments
Dave
12/27/2014 11:59:56 am

I've had so many issues with apartment living that I've given up on it and now insist on a single family home. Every single apartment is guaranteed to have an annoying neighbor - there are just too many people packed closely together.

If you have someone above you, they will be stompers.

If you have someone below you, they will be loud music people.

If you have someone to the side, they will have an untrained dog that barks all day.

One time I even had a chain smoker below me, and had to deal with smoke pouring through electrical outlets and windows.

Reply
Emlyn link
12/31/2014 12:45:58 pm

Thanks for the comment, Dave. I can't even imagine how horrible it must've been for you to have smoke filtering into your apartment. My biggest smell trigger is smoke.

I guess I've lived in apartments so long, it was the first choice I thought of when I made the move to Vegas. Unfortunately for me, wood and stucco apartments don't have the same sound muffling qualities as the steel and concrete high-rises in which I've lived up until 2011.

The management office is sympathetic with my situation, but despite offering me another apartment in the same complex or at another of the property management's communities, I know if I'm going to make a major move again, it'd have to be somewhere that I don't have ANY shared walls/ceilings/floors.

I've had friends and colleagues tell me that I could still have sound issues from neighbors even in a single-family home, I still think it'd be better than having shared paper thin walls/ceilings/floors.

Best wishes for a happy (and trigger-free) new year!

Reply
Judy link
1/14/2015 02:08:16 pm

With a house that you own you can soundproof if necessary. I wonder if it's time to look around for a home of your own.

Reply
Emlyn
2/7/2015 05:22:56 am

Well, I'm actually renting the house, not owning one yet, but in the week that I've been here so far... It's been HEAVEN! I rarely hear anything outside and have been more relaxed than I can remember in a LONG time. (Now if I could only do something about my workplace environment...) %'\

I've even had to mentally remind myself that I don't have attached neighbors anymore. (Occasionally I dropped something while unpacking my bedroom and found my thoughts wandering to whether or not the neighbors below heard the noise... But I don't have neighbors below anymore. Yay!) :-)

Reply



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    About the Author

    Emlyn Altman has been suffering with misophonia for over 35 years, even though she only found out about the actual medical condition much more recently. As frustrating as the condition has been over the years, her heightened sensitivities across all the senses considerably influenced her talents within the visual fine arts (particularly sculpture), music (singing, piano, and many other instruments), writing, and culinary backgrounds, as well as professional achievements as an architectural lighting designer. Her goal in developing this website is to promote more awareness about misophonia and help other sufferers as well.


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