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The "Butterfly's Whisper" Blog

Welcome to my blog. I hope by sharing my own misophonia experiences, others who are frustrated with misophonia sensitivities will discover that they're not alone. I also hope that people who may not have misophonia will gain some insight about what it's like to have this condition.

Please feel free to post any comments or use the "Contact Us" page if you have any questions/comments you don't want to post online.

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Spoiled by my Vegas and NJ salons

6/27/2015

2 Comments

 
When it comes to products or services, once I find a company or person that I like, I am very loyal to them. For twenty-five years, I used the same hair dresser in New Jersey - regardless of whether I was living in Boston, Philly, DC, or even Iowa. Once I moved to Vegas though, and my trips back home were not as frequent, I finally gave in and found a hair stylist I liked. I think what made me gravitate to him was that he studied under Vidal Sassoon like my hairdresser back in Jersey. He was excellent, and I liked the salon where he worked too. Now that I moved to the northwest, today was my first time with a new stylist. I think I've been spoiled by my Vegas and NJ stylists/salons because today was not as good of an experience as I hoped it would be.

Right off the bat, the place was very dark and gloomy. As an architectural designer, I understand the desire to used exposed structure and HVAC ductwork in a space, but it wasn't done well here. The walls were dark purple and the ceiling and upper 5' of the walls were painted black, so the sporadically placed adjustable lights were complete glare bombs - especially when having to look right up into them while having my hair washed. The styling chairs were also very uncomfortable, especially when having to sit in one for an hour.

You may ask why I'm going into this level of detail in a misophonia blog... I was already uncomfortable in the environment, so when someone started whistling to the loud music playing in the salon, I rushed to put my earplugs in. I felt bad for the stylist, who was very nice and tried to start some chit chat conversation. Unfortunately, wearing earplugs to block out trigger sounds on top of having to take my eyeglasses off while having my hair done (which meant I couldn't even fake being able to hear what she was saying since I couldn't lipread in a dark room - especially without my glasses), made it too hard to contribute to the dialogue. I tried to explain that I couldn't hear her because I was wearing earplugs since I was sensitive to sound, but she continued to ask me questions and try to converse. It was clear she didn't understand my discomfort.

Oh well... Maybe I just need to periodically take a trip back down to Vegas to have my hair done and see friends that I left behind.  :-)
2 Comments
Tom
7/6/2015 09:25:35 am

I have had this problem my entire life and it hasn't gotten any better even though I am 56 yrs old. Sounds that REALLY set me off and stress me out big time are:

1. Someone slurping their coffee (I'm not a coffee drinker)
2. Someone eating nachos or other crunchy foods like corn on the cob, uncooked carrots, etc.
3. Someone eating cereal and slurping the milk
4. If I am in an enclosed office with a co-worker, the constant typing drives me crazy. It's a definite "non-food" trigger for me.

I find that I am most agitated when I'm trying to concentrate at work and this is going on in the same room that I work. I try to tell myself "They're not trying to annoy me, they mean no harm in what they're doing" - that does help me to calm down just a little. But anytime I hear these sounds it sends my blood pressure up big time.

I do have a question though -- I am curious whether anyone else experiences some "twists" or nuances of my misphonia. Here are some examples:

1. For some reason, I can tolerate someone making these noises (and I have less stress) when certain members of my family make the noise. For example, I'm not as enraged when one of my sons makes a "trigger" noise, but am really enraged when the other son does. Not sure why that is -- I love them both the same. Very unusual.
2. I have a great relationship with my wife of 30+ years, but when she makes one of these trigger sounds, I get really agitated.
3. I have had trouble sleeping most of adult life -- on occasion, I have night terrors. Am wondering if there is any common thread with others who share my misophonia problem?

Any input on how to reduce the overwhelming stress I feel when a "trigger" is introduced would be helpful.

Reply
Emlyn
7/7/2015 12:43:57 am

Hi, Tom. I have heard an read about similar "twists" where misophonia triggers are stronger with family members than the general public, but not your first twist where the intensity of trigger is different for two family members equally close to you.

Your third twist is something I can completely relate to though. I have always had sleep problems, usually related to stress (even before I knew about misophonia, although I'm sure it contributed to the stress at the time). I'm long overdue to change the poll question on the home page of this site, and I think that would be a great question. I'll make the change as soon as I can.

As far as how to reduce trigger stress... That's something I'm still trying to figure out, although last year I saw a therapist who was teaching me about mindfulness meditation. (If you do a search for "mindfulness" on this website, you should find those posts.) He even told me about Jon Kabat-Zinn's mindfulness YouTube videos, which I started to watch on a daily basis, until I moved to Vegas last year. Now that I've moved again to a new higher level job, I need to get back into the swing of things because my stress is beyond the roof right now and I've got to get it under control.

If you go to the "Other Resources" link at the top of this page, there's a sub-link to coping tools, in which I have links to other information that may help you too.

Reply



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    About the Author

    Emlyn Altman has been suffering with misophonia for over 35 years, even though she only found out about the actual medical condition much more recently. As frustrating as the condition has been over the years, her heightened sensitivities across all the senses considerably influenced her talents within the visual fine arts (particularly sculpture), music (singing, piano, and many other instruments), writing, and culinary backgrounds, as well as professional achievements as an architectural lighting designer. Her goal in developing this website is to promote more awareness about misophonia and help other sufferers as well.


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